Airing out some baggage:

This was supposed to come right after St. Patty's day but... life happens:

Holidays are best spent with family and friends, and I have discovered a whole new reason why.


First, Those that know me are aware of a dark period of my life that I went through in college. I've worked very hard since then and am proud to say that, despite some bad decisions, I have managed to get my life back and be in a really good place. I have the most wonderful family in the world (about to be doubled) and the greatest friends I could ever ask for. They have stuck through some really bad times and I am grateful for that.

Last night I was confronted face to face with a shadow from my past. It's been over 4 years since he has been a part of my life, but the pain from those wounds and the regret from my decisions still hurt.

Over the years I have attempted to get closure from him, but every time I spoke with him I found that it never made me feel any better, and always made me upset or angry. I decided a while ago that there was no reason for me to talk to him, and when he contact me a little over a year ago I said just that. I had nothing to say to him and I didn't want to hear whatever it was he had to say.

What upsets me is that even after that conversation he has still tried to contact me via email. I of course ignore him and hoped that he would get the picture(i had hoped we could pretend that we didn't know each other). So, last night when he approached me, I can only imagine what his justification for that would be. Did he think I was over it? Maybe he could change my mind about him? Perhaps he thought he could make peace and we could be friends?

Whatever far fetched and twisted reason he cam up with, he walked over to my group of friends. Because my friends could see how distressed I was they quickly ushered me to my car before he could get a word in.... this is why I love my friends.

Which now brings me to my point:

The Purpose of this blog is to tackle and approach my great expectations. My goals dreams and aspirations and whatever it takes to get there. I have skeletons, baggage and things form my past that will tempt me test me and try me; and it is how i choose to handle these upsets that will ultimately define me. I have learned from my mistakes and I know what it will take for me to succeed. My mistakes in the past have only made me stronger and allowed me to realize what I deserve:

I DESERVE Happiness
I DESERVE to not be afraid
I DESERVE to live my life the way I want
I DESERVE the love from my family
I DESERVE my friends

I am worthy powerful and capable and no one can take that from me.

"Life's challenges are not supposed to paralyze you, they're supposed to help you discover who you are" - Bernice Johnson Reagan